Aiks~~

So hate~
again, this weird feel came back to me
same as what i had experienced two years ago
moody all the time,
even get anorexia now..
what again now?!!
i hate myself for being so useless,
not the first time i get such hurt from you
why i just can't let it go thoroughgoing?
maybe i should also dissapear for couple weeks? or a month?
just to let my mind cool down~
i wish that my "sister and buddy" can come back sandakan earlier..
miss you all le~~ @@
sobs sobs

so, who wanna find me,
i guess that's hard~
i will just silent my mobile phone all the time..
don't find me le..
and my digi that number also almost no credit already..
but, i think i will continue update my blog? perhaps i will~

disappointed

Can you just stop doing this to me?
How much hurt you wanna let me taste again?!
Don't think that i won't feel tired~
I'm really tired now,
tired to wait when just you are in the right mood then suddenly come to find me
Am i look like a clown for you?
Stop it please~

The happiest, also the saddest..

The happiest, also the saddest,
is it must like this just fair?
i guess so, this called LIFE~

Saturday night,
i really feel happy and tonight also consider as my happiest night with my friend
this is because finally we get our yearly reunion,
this not what we can always have since quite a lot of us study at another state,
quite hard to find a right timing to meet up like tonight~

Then, what should i feel sad for?
this reunion honestly cannot said that take a long time,
it just take us three hours to stay at the restaurant..
is three hours quite long for you?
time for eat (that's a steamboat buffet), time for chit chat, time for photographing~
actually three hours can say to be short, aren't you all think so?

To someone in my house:
i do respect you as my older,
i ask for the permission to attend the dinner tonight,
don't forget that you the one who let me go;
then now, why you are the one who scold me?
sister said that she will settle the flight ticket matter with me after i reached home..
if you so worried about this, why don't you gave me a call and ask me?
i'm not say that i wont be answering your call even though i'm having my dinner..
why you just cant say nicely to me after i get back home?
NO, once you saw me then you start your scolding, for no reason, do you respect me?

okay, fine, i talked to sister and finally settle everything you want
do you feel satisfied now?

i din't know that i'm getting bad luck tonight or what~
when i tried to talk my problem with my sis,
she misunderstand my message just because she suddenly disconnect,
then second round of scolding came to me again~

Oh well, until today i just know that what am i to you, sister;
am i really that unmature that cannot think carefully?
I'm not child, sure i will differentiate what i can do and also what i can't
u don't need to hurt me with the words.. you made me cried!!
why you all just like to treat me as a child that never grow up~
okie, you appologize for the mistake you had made, i accept it..
Why? because you are my sister.. you are my family,
no matter what wrong you all did to me,
i always try my best to put it down as soon as possible~

today is sunday,
also is the family day~
but if there are some problem within this family
does this family day still can be happy?

no, it won't
so i choose to keep all the matter in my mind..
and tomorrow morning, i will act like nothing
as what i always do..
never let you guys know about me,
cause you all wont care what's in my mind~
although i wanna share with you all, that's also useless~
cause no one will listen to me..
always i'm the one who bear with the problem i face~

YING!! BE TOUGH!! NEVER LET THESE NONSENSE PROBLEM BEAT YOU DOWN!!

Don't blame on me anymore~!! Don't try to piss me off!!

Ish~ the offer letter from IMU not yet received, you blame on me..
May i ask,
- am i the postman?
- am i the one who post this letter out?
the admission officer just told me the letter will be sent out soon at 5/5/09, now not yet reach one week, you so worry for what?

Okay, cousins had booked the ticket back to sibu for CNY..
you ask me find her and talk to, i did, just she cant sign in her msn account.
May i ask again, should this blame on me?
- How i know why she cant log in?
- how i know why her line so bad?

And, the university not belong to me, how i know when will the holiday for CNY start since i haven't enter it? That's really sounds funny!!!!!!

Even if i check for the price, how i book the ticket if daddy haven't agree with it?

NO, YOU NEVER THINK OF IT!!!!
you just keep blaming on me, is that your hobby?
i felt lazy to argue, you wan scold, just continue then~
I DON'T CARE!!!!